I Hate It – She Has Everything I Want!
I Hate It - She Has Everything I Want!
It dawned on me the other day when I was feeling triggered by someone I admire, someone from the outside that has everything I want.
She has the million pound turnover business, lives by the sea, has a husband who helps her run the business and has even lost weight recently. Grrrrr…..don’t you just hate it when someone has it all?
When I found out she had been in business less time than me, I was so triggered. I was thinking things like "That’s not fair", "She has it all", "Why her, why not me?", "When will it be my turn?".
I'm Only Human After All
Well, after all, I am human. I recognised these were not helpful feelings, and that they would drive my dreams further away than ever if I allowed them to continue.
Being jealous is negative, it is about wanting what someone else has and taking it away from them. I certainly didn’t want to do that as this is an abundant Universe we are in and there is more than enough for us all. It would, however, stop my manifesting if I didn’t clear it. I realised I was envious. I knew I could work with envy. Envy showed me I wanted it even more than ever, it was an emotion to leverage from.
If I could turn envy around I could manifest from this place. So I allowed all the feelings to come up, I journalled on them. I knew if I can heal it rather than pushing it to one side it could no longer stop me and leave me blocked.
I was accepting of how I felt. I gave myself time and space to acknowledge the feelings. I meditated on it and forgave myself, her and anything else attached to it that came up.
Then it hit me, this was a huge opportunity for growth. I would never get my dreams to come true if I thought she was ahead of me. I realised we are all on different journeys, but we all started the same way and end in the same place. We all come into this world and we all leave.
We Are All Equal
What we do when we are here is dependant upon what we think. When we are born we are all little babies, all the same. Our experiences and what we allow ourselves to think, mould our lives.
I can think exactly the same as any other person I admire, but if I think they are better than me I will never be able to be or have the same as them or more, as I am limiting myself. We are all equal.
Once this had settled in my mind, it felt so empowering. Such a relief too. I just needed to think, and most of all, believe my goals and dreams are possible. Sure, I have done well up to now, but I have some big goals ahead of me and I am now excited at what is really possible.
Works In Progress
I concluded this healing by posting a message to her and telling her why she had triggered me and that I was so thankful that she had as it had given me an opportunity to work through it. The response was an additional healing that I didn’t expect, but wow, it feels incredible now, I feel like I have released so much.
So my final point to help you on your healing journey is to ask you: What triggers you? Is it a person or a situation? Is it something someone says? If so, take it as something you can heal and leverage your manifesting from. As we are all works in progress.
I don’t know what will come from letting all this go for myself as yet but I have certainly made space for more magic.
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Amanda Tooke, also known as “The Angel Mystic” is a Spiritual Teacher to people with big dreams. Amanda is also a Reiki Master, a published author and has featured on television, radio and columnist for Fate & Fortune Magazine. Amanda is the creator of The MAP – Manifesting Abundance Process that she teaches in her membership site Abundance Club. Amanda also runs 5 * Angels in Anglesey Exclusive Spiritual Retreats, plus various online programmes and 1:1 work encompassing Angels, Spiritual Development and the Law of Attraction and the energy of Passion!
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